My Blog

ROQUE as inspired by TED.com

Joseph D'Souza - Tuesday, July 08, 2014

 In this blog I wish to stretch your mind. I wish to test your patience. I wish to shift your paradigms. And I wish for you some transformational insights!

Warning: This is not a light browse! This is not a short post!

I am by now an avid fan of TED.com and indeed use the rich diversity of speakers, content and knowledge across so many experiences that a TED talk is my equivalent for regular and consistent inspiration.

 The ROQUE coaching and discovery process is being used is more scenarios than could ever be imagined. And that should not be surprising. Every individual is unique. Our experiences are our own even when shared. What we project and how to illumine what we see, do and get, is one of the joys of the human experience.

Take a topic, subject, problem, issue. With ROQUE, we then start to look at R=REALITY Now:

R = REALITY Now:

Firstly, can you empty your mind so that there is no 'baggage'? And trust me, with practise, you can bring this state to bear in a millisecond!  Here is an inspiring short clip by Andy Puddicombe.


 From this awareness in the REALITY Now stage of ROQUE, we can now see emerging a range of Options.

 O = OPTIONS:

We are able to consciously see a range of directions, options, paths. Even before evaluating we should stop that conditioned sense of rush we all seem to be evolved to. If you think you have seen all the options available. Be assured you have not. Shift your perspectives, change your paradigms. Leverage others' perspectives. And discover more options.

Now here is a challenge for you. Is option a choice? Ofcourse no. Choice implies a decision. But we do confuse both. See what Barry Schwartz says in his "Paradox of choice talk"!.

OK. Now we have OPTIONS before us and again with ROQUE, we now need to make a decision. With The ROQUE process, we prefer to use the term QUEST instead of goal or choice or indeed decision albeit all are relevant with a key proviso.

Q = QUEST : 

QUEST within the ROQUE process is about an activity between the Head i.e. our rational process and our Heart i.e our emotional responses. It is not that the head and heart need to be in balance. What we are looking for is a congruence between the head and the heart. Where there is no conflict such as: I think I should do this because, yet I don't feel good about it! This latter tension is not conducive to good decisions unless you also have a strategy to placating the cause of the tension. With congruency of head and heart, there is alignment. There is momentum. There is and energy that is positive and even magnanimous. 

See how Sheena Iyengar suggests how businesses (and others) can improve the experience of choosing.

 

 

U = UNIQUE Needs: 

Having decided upon a QUEST, ROQUE suggests we need to identify what our UNIQUE Needs are which must be satisfied or put into place even before we can embark upon our Quest. If for example our Quest is to bake a cake, we need to know not only what ingredients we must have, but also the equipment, know-how, and our 'end in mind'. What is our intended fulfillment requiring us to include? 

Here is a challenging tangent perspective from Dan Gilbert talking about why we make bad decisions;

 

 

E = EXECUTION:

Now ROQUE takes us to the actions we need to implement in order to make the Quest real. If you have to struggle to identify the actions, to create your SMART goals, to build your execution plan, then somewhere, you must have missed a turn in your QUEST stage. What ROQUE suggests, is that the right Quest inspires the identification of the UNIQUE Needs which in turn inform the EXECUTION process.

 Here Simon Sinek elegantly reveals some secrets!

 

 

Did you have a quest of your own advanced by this contribution?

Feel free to comment below or email me at:  coach@questunique.com.au

A Fairyum was ROQUED!

Joseph D'Souza - Sunday, July 06, 2014

Some years ago, I bought my wife a surprise Valentine's gift. It was a garden sculpture we'd both seen at an international garden festival. 'Elfin' by Sioux Dollman, caught our eyes quite independently as we experienced a walk through the sculpture garden. I caught sight of Pauline's gaze as she became entrapped with how Elfin talked to her. Then I knew I had to get it for her. It was one of those longing looks that said, "I would love to have this fairy' but there is no way we could afford it'.

I traced Sioux during the following week. The festival had finished and sculpture owners and attendants were taking down stalls and exhibits. I drove by en-route to the office and stopped and asked many a friendly soul through the wire fencing if they knew who the owner of Elfin was. Someone knew Sioux and gave me her phone  number. I called Sioux. Elfin was still for sale. My breath was somewhat taken away at the price. Then I had that mad flash of inspiration and said yes.

 Now Elfin was  made for the garden, but once Pauline knew it was her very own fairy, she kept it in our garden studio which doubled up as my home office and guest suite. Well Elfin, now named "Joplin" was quite the subject of many conversations and photographs whenever we had guests - local or overseas.

We did a tree change and bought a semi rural property in the beautiful Yarra Valley in Victoria. Now we had to locate a new home for Joplin. My coaching business was developing and one of the processes I use is known as ROQUE.

 

R=Reality Now: Pauline had by now become a fairy junky. Every present self bought or bought by me, and then prompted to join in of others, involved buying fairy figurines. Before I met her, everything that grew in the garden was a weed. I loved gardening. Now Pauline discovered the joys of gardening and has brought more colour into our lives than I could have imagined. Pauline wanted to develop a garden not just for plants, but to place some of her other talents in art as a hobby. These included folk art painting, pottery, mosaic work, collecting trinkets for the garden, and ofcourse a variety of flowering plants.You can see some of Pauline's hobby art in this capture.


A challenge I saw was how Pauline would keep the hundreds of fairies clean from both the weather and visiting feathered friends! We had a space at the back of the house which if I 'squared off', could be made into a covered conservatory.  Now we had bought our 'Canta Libre' (name for our home) for a lifestyle and I enjoyed the prospects of really getting hands on with some serious Do it Yourself projects. A neighbour at our former home was rebuilding and I saw all the discarded windows and timber as raw materials for rural living projects!

O=Options: It seemed that with all this reality of opportunity. synchronicity was also happening. We now had the space to build garden rockeries. I could build sheds! We had glass from old windows that could be used for garden features. We had stumps of trees. We had a small fernery at the back of the house - thanks to previous owners. We had lots of wildlife coming to the house - more varieties of birds than we can to date name. Possums, wallabies, wombats, deer - Samba and Fallow. We had moved to the Yarra Valley when this part of Australia was still in a prolonged drought. So anything Pauline attempted to plant was seen as a salad bowl for our visiting fauna. Then ofcourse we have Tiger snakes and King Brown snakes. And I am always concerned with the happy and contented wife enjoying and being transported in thoughts whilst hobbying.....and what she may accidentally trod upon and be at risk.

Q=QUEST: So what should we decide and what should we do? Ofcourse! Make a Fairy garden! The concept became revealed in the reality of the fairy and plant collection, and the options inspiring projects from the windows and doors I had collected, including some mirrors from 'hard rubbish'. I decided with head and heart to build something that whilst Pauline could not visualize because it was in my head, that she too would enjoy. So I thought: They have aviaries for birds, hives for bees, aquariums for fish, Emporiums for collections, why not a Fairyum for fairies!!!!!!!!!!!!

U=UNIQUE Needs: Well I had the raw materials and Pauline had this population of fairies to dance around Joplin. I needed some help with structural design so I thought I would leverage advice from my neighbour and his trade skills. I decided that this being one of those yearned for do it yourself projects for me, that I would not purchase any new materials. Instead, I would recycle! I would use the by now vast array of 'raw materials for future projects', - which by the way Her Madamship calls my junk! I also knew my intuition and intimate knowledge of The Maharani's habits i.e. shopping - would see that I had to build something to accommodate future capacity!! That is, even more fairies, wind catchers, bug sculptures etcetera. I was proved right even before the Fairyum was structurally taking shape!

EXECUTION: Then I just got on with it. I have to say, that fairies were moving in even before I completed. Talk about pressure when this was just a hobby quest! Joplin's location dictated the focal point. There is very little to be said about the execution process and steps as all that labour of love is lost to the love of the Fairyum Pauline is enjoying. All our visitors, babies, young children - even the eldest visitor, Artist Mimi Fry at 92 years old has been photographed inside the Fairyum examining details.

Then Pauline developed a love of orchids!


 

A video clip at the Fairyum!

 



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